


Things Most Don't Know About G. Sara Ryder

by Music_Feeds_My_Soul



Category: Mass Effect: Andromeda
Genre: Drabbles, F/M, headcanons
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-04-02
Updated: 2017-04-06
Packaged: 2018-10-14 03:22:28
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 11
Words: 2,614
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10527798
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Music_Feeds_My_Soul/pseuds/Music_Feeds_My_Soul
Summary: Drabbles/headcanons about about my first Ryder and how she deals with being Pathfinder, her brother in a coma, dad dead and the fact she might have a thing for the new alien on board.





	1. Chapter 1

Here's the thing- Sara is not a leader.

No seriously. She's not a leader, she was never trained to be one! Sure, she took one bloody class at Grissom Academy when she was sent there after the third time her biotics went haywire and react with Scott's. Even in basic she was never slated to be a leader. She knows the theories sure.

But in practise? She's the sidekick, the prankster. She was shunted off to support and glad for it, she follows her orders, gets her job done and is happy for it. You want a leader? Ask Scott- he was the one who aced his classes and was considered for N7 training before dad's work with AI got out. The one time Sara had to be a leader? Her entire squad got killed, plus the scientists they were with.

 She doesn't like talking about it.

Sara was never meant to be a leader. She really wasn't. It was why she was happy just being support in the Pathfinder team. If dad died then Cora would take over. If she bit it, Scott was next. Sara got to avoid that line of succession because if Scott died, you know she'd be dead to. She'd die right after him or before him, her implant screaming and her guts on the ground.

Then Habitat 7 happened and everything went sideways.

If she didn't feel like it would be betraying her dad, her brother and her mother, she'd shove the role of Pathfinder off onto Cora and book it. But it does feel like it.

So she doesn't.


	2. Names

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> What does the G stand for?

The only people who know what the G in G. Sara Ryder stands for is Lexi, Scott and Henry. She's gone by her middle name since elements when she was told her name was an old ladies name. Like a really old lady.

She didn't like that much.

But anyway, no one knows what it stands for and Scott is under oath not to tell or she'd spill his middle name.

(It's Gertrude, alright? She doesn't want to get rid of it because it was her grandmother's name, and because GSR are some of the coolest initials ever.)

(Scott's middle name is Dexleton.)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Embarrassing first names. Not to offend anyone named Gertrude, I just have only meant old ladies named that.


	3. Father

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sara Ryder and her thoughts on her father.

Whenever Cora talks about Alec, Sara bites her tongue.

 Cora only knows the man who she met, she never met the one Sara had known.

 When her mother was diagnosed, Sara and Scott were very young. Six years old. It was after the contact war, after it was discovered the two of them were biotics- powerful ones. Alec stopped being a dad then, throwing himself into his work, thirsty for a way to save his wife.

 Sara would defend her father as a good man. Alec Ryder was a genius, a fantastic solider, a husband who loved his wife beyond all understanding.

 He had not been a father. Not truly. Sara has fond memories of him being one, but those are few. She has more memories of her grandfather then her father.

 Cora knows the man as a mentor, and links it to a father.

 Alec Ryder wasn’t one.


	4. Drack and Grandfathers

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sara thinks about Drack

Drack reminds Sara fondly of her grandfather- Marcus Ryder. He had been an cop who had a thousand stories and interesting anecdotes about everything. He had never censored his language about anything, and was the most frank man she had ever met- until Drack anyway.

 Marcus had raised Alec all by himself when his wife, Gertrude had died in childbirth giving birth to triplets. Only Alec had survived the birth. Marcus told a thousand stories about Alec’s childhood and alec would recount with a story about his father.

 He’d been a man who snuck Scott and Sara beer when they were fourteen- and then made their hangovers worse. He had taught Sara how to use an assault rifle, and Scott a pistol.

 He’d been the one to push for Sara and Scott to go to a psychologist early on and their autism was discovered, and then he pushed for them to go to Grissom Academy after they nearly destroyed the house- again.

 He’d died in a hostage situation where he saved a young Asari’s life. Scott and Sara had been devastated and it was one of the few times Sara remembers their dad hugging them.

 Upon meeting Drack, Sara couldn’t help but immediately like him. She’s fairly certain she will never regret inviting him on her ship.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I like Drack. He reminds me of my dad in a really weird way. Then again Wrex did to, so... Krogans make me think dad? Though Grunt was never... huh.


	5. Biotics

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sara and her biotic abilities.

Sara and Scott had never actually had their biotic potential recorded. Grissom Academy hadn’t bothered, because they were aware their mother had worked on biotic implants, and she had been routinely exposed to Element Zero while pregnant. So the kids were powerful, that was all they needed to know. 

 It only really came out when they were nineteen- dad’s AI research out and the two of them suspended because of what their dad did- and they found out that their mother’s boss had known what it could do, and had never taken any precautions.

 He had then run off and was hiding on a pirate facility. Sara and Scott went after him.

 They ripped the place apart. Only rubble was left.

 Everyone thought it was an Asari who did it. And they never said a word.

 (Scott stopped using his biotics after that. Sara just kept honing them more and more.

 Sometimes she wonders how Cora would react if Sara told her that she almost became a commando as well. Sara just turned them down because she wanted to go into N school.

 She never did.)

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, so Ellen was routinely exposed to Element Zero, right? It caused her disease. So, I like to think that Scott and Sara were heavily exposed to it while she was pregnant, and thus the two of them became very powerful. Like crazy powerful. 
> 
> Also- I'm not sure what to think of Cora. On one hand, she's an interesting character. On the other, she annoyed me for some reason during my first playthrough. Maybe it was because I was RPing but... I just didn't like her much. As such, in my head she has a small rivalry with Sara because of the Pathfinder thing and Alec. I kind feel like Cora may hold it over Sara's head that she was an Asari Commando, though this is just my headcanon for this character.


	6. Jaal

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> When Sara first met Jaal...

  When Jaal first came aboard, Sara was a little nervous. First contact (and wow, that just proved she was not a leader right there- who makes jokes to their crew about their death? Like, what?) had gone alright, and now they were working together.

 She just had no clue how to get to know him. She could understand the others on board- they all had something in common. The Milky Way.

 Jaal? Not so much. So she may have kinda creeped on him- just a little.

 When she found him tinkering, she had her answer.

 Showing up with a box of tech parts, a busted omnitool he could rip apart and some funny stories about Scott’s various mishaps with tinkering?

 That she could do.

 “And then Scott just turns to the pyjack and goes: Well we won’t say anything if you don’t!” Sara laughs as Jaal chuckles deepened.

 “So it really nearly blew up an entire compound?”

 “Oh god yes, and ever since then, I just steal all his omnigel canisters.” Sara shook her head. “Way less of an issue then.”

 Jaal’s laugh deepens and the two begin to share stories of sibling mishaps.

 Sara counts it as a win.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This Sara isn't good with tech, but she knows siblings!


	7. Scar

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sara likes telling stories about her scar.

 Sara’s large scar on her face- just under her right eye, the one that looks like a burn, has a different story every time.

 “House fire- my roommate was trying to cook some random Asari meal,” was the story she told Peebee when asked.

 “Wild pyjacks with matches, surrounded me and my brother! They lit us on fire!” was the story she told Drack, who laughed at her.

 (“What is it with you and pyjacks kid.”

 “They’re evil, awful, freaky creatures.”

 “And we have one on the ship.”

 “He’s a replacement for Scott.”)

 “Missile to the face, walked it off.” Was the story to Cora and Liam. (Cora figured out she was lying but Liam still thinks it was a missile.)

 But when Jaal asked, she actually just told him,

 “I don’t like talking about it much.”

 “Very well… though Liam apparently believe a missile caused it?”

 “Okay, I like telling people weird stories, it’s fun… and Liam’s reaction was funny.”

 "I see... I will not tell either."

 "Thank you."

 Sara continued making up stories about her scar after that, a grin on her face.

 Jaal sometimes helped.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If Liam didn't have the same name as my baby brother, I'd be romancing him. As such... no, just... no.
> 
> Based off a friend of my older brother's. His scar was really nasty.


	8. Tatoo

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sara and her tattoo

 “Hey Ryder,” Liam asks one night while the crew played bullshit, teaching Jaal the game. It was amusing as well. “What’s with the tattoo?”

 Sara blinks, tapping to left side of her face, the circular tattoo around her ear a little faded. “Oh, this? Scott and I went out and got it after we enlisted. It’s supposed to represent the circle coming together- father joining, us joining, hence the two circles.”

 It was her straight face that sold the lie as they returned to the game.

 The real reason they got the tattoo was because both of them had been drunk off their asses, bored and Scott had a friend who was a tattoo artist. Both swore a pact never to admit the real story. Ever.

 (Except Sara ends up telling it one night to Jaal, not wanting lies between them.

 He laughs and laughs. And then admits he already knew, because Scott told him offhandedly.

 That bastard.)


	9. Stim

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sara and her stimming

  Some days it was hard. Some days all she wanted to do was rip her skin off and claw at herself. There was just to much. To many people relying on her, to much noise, to much to do, to much to think.

 On those days, Sara would stay in her room. She would turn on some music and begin to pace, back and forth in a zig-zag pattern, breathing in and out slowly.

 On the days she couldn’t stay in her room, she would fiddle with her hoodie sleeves, tap her fingers on her pistol, over and over again.

 No one really noticed, not really. Not until she felt so tightly wound, so strained, she ended up pacing all around the Tempest, her hood up and headphones in.

 Lexi, witnessing it, quickly notified the others not to talk to her, until she was done.

 “It’s a stim.” Sara tells the crew. “I just… it gets to much. Everything just…” she waves a hand. “I need it.”

 The crew doesn’t really bring it up again, but they research it seperately and things come together.

 Vetra finds a couple of stim toys that Sara happily uses while she does paperwork, to keep herself calm. Jaal gives her small wristbands with pieces of fabric hanging off she can play with so she doesn't ruin her hoodie. Gil and Suvi both make clear paths for her in the ship. Liam doesn't bother her when she runs a hand over his couch, feeling the fabric. Peebee and Drack both make a point to block people who get annoyed by her tapping. Cora lets her mess with the plants, Kallo lets her fiddle with layouts. Lexi finds new music for her- ones for concentration and destressing.

 Sara loves her crew

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Heavily based off me and my baby bro. Both of us are autistic. Both of us are classified as high functioning but everything has it’s differences. I stim with pacing, tapping, running my hand up and down things like clothes or fabrics. He paces to, or by waving his hands. He makes a few noises sometimes to.  
>  Never ever tell someone stimming to stop. It’s like telling someone who needs a cane to stop using it or someone who needs medicine he doesn’t. It’s something that helps us, and telling people to stop is just… no. Just don’t.


	10. Heart

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Spoilers for Hunting the Archon! Spoilers! (Also, I would like to inform you that these drabbles are not linear, I jump around in time.) 
> 
> Sara has always had a big heart.

 When she was twenty, her mother told her to fall in love at least once before she died. Sara didn't tell her that she had.

 Erica was she was sixteen and kissing girls in the back hallways at Grissom's was the scariest thing ever.

 Jacob when she was eighteen and in boot camp, the communal showers a place to have a quickie.

 Her next love came after her mothers funeral, the casket closed and the ceremony somber.

 Her name was Ember, and she was a sniper who had a smile in her eyes that made Sara's heart soar. They danced around each other, closer and closer until they tumbled into bed with laughter and smiles. Sara had a ring in her mind and a plan in her heart when her father showed her the Initiative. Sara turned to Ember and...

 Things crumbled like dust. "Why do you want to follow them?" "Our lives are here!" "Aren't I enough for you?" "Why is your family so important?"

  Sara didn't and still doesn't understand. Her family is important. A lover, even one she loves enough to wed cannot change that. They do not diminish in the face of her love. And her love for adventure was a thirst she could not quench. 

 Ember left and Sara signed up, her heart shattered. 

 And then more were added to it, her heart becoming bigger as she spoke with her crew, sat by her brother's side. She loved them all, though she would admit one held her heart a bit differently. He did not seem to mind though, that he shared her heart.

 "I do not understand why this woman makes this demand," Jaal complains one night when Sara tortures the crew with terrible TV shows from the 1990s. "Family and friends do not become less important to someone once a lover is involved."

 "It's a human thing," Sara explains. "I think. I don't get it either- it's why my last relationship ended. She didn't like the fact I put family above her. She also didn't like I wanted to come to Andromeda."

 "Everybody wants to feel important," Cora says casually while Liam and Peebee begin heckling the actors on screen.

 "Still don't get it."

 Later when Sara is caught in the energy field, she shakes in horror, her to big heart beating and beating over and over again. Her family, her crew... Jaal will die if she doesn't figure out...

 SAM comes through and it's not a choice. She closes her eyes and agrees.

 For her family, for those who hold her heart, she will die to make sure they are okay. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Bit of me needing through. Why do girlfriends/boyfriends become so important to people? I mean, I get like if your friends are assholes trying to make you choose, or just dicks in general, but why abandon your friends? Ditch your family? It just doesn't make sense!!


	11. Family

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sara on her family and those she left behind in the Milky Way.

 “Did you leave any other family members in the Milky Way?” Jaal asks one night, the two of them in the nomad’s hanger, Sara stitching up her hoodie while Jaal works on some… thing.

 Sara isn’t very sure what it is, not really.

 “Not really. My dad’s mom died in childbirth, and he was the only triplet to survive. My grandfather died when I was sixteen, and he never remarried, so no one there.” Sara replies, cursing as she pokes her finger.

 “Triplet?” Jaal asks, curiously.

 “Three babies born from the same mother on the same day,” Sara explains. She grins at the jump from Jaal. Seems like the angara were single birth children, like the turians or the asari. “Like how me and Scott are twins- two babies from the same mother on the same day.”

 “Is that common?” Jaal asks. “The krogan have multiples as well, as do salarians, correct?”

 “Yes- though that’s a bit different.” Sara explains. “It’s mostly single births from humans. Typically though, people who come from multiple birth families have multiple birth children. Like, my mother was a quadruplet- four babies.”

 “Your poor grandmother,” Vetra calls from where she works. Sara laughs. The Tempest had slowly gained a ‘if it’s in public, join in’ view of conversations. Private conversations were spent behind doors. Open areas were fair game.

 “Agreed. Anyway, so mom had me and Scott, and I’ve been informed- many times- that the chances were high I’d have multiples.”

 “Poor you!” Peebee called from the floor above, and Sara snickered some more.

 “So you have some uncles and aunts you left?” Jaal asks, amused himself.

 “Yes and no. My uncle Tim- mom’s brother- died in the First Contact War with no kids.” Sara explains. “Aunt Jane and her wife died on Mindoir when I was around 7- slavers attacked. Aunt Hannah though, she married an Asari. They had a kid before I came here- might have a cousin still alive in the Milky Way.” Sara shrugged as she finished fixing her hoodie. “We weren’t close with my grandparents on my mom’s side. To xenophobic, disproved of all our choices.”

 “No one else left behind?” Peebee asks, the rest of the crew looking curious.

 “Other then my ex, no.” Sara shrugs.

 (Later, when she learns about her mother, she breaks down, sobbing. Later, she whispers over and over that her mother is alive, she’s alive.

 Later, Jaal sits with her in front of a cyro pod and watches.)

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Fun fact- I never finished the quest where you hunt down all the memories due to the fact I was getting frustrated because of school and work. It meant I couldn’t play as much as I wanted, so I ended up rushing the ending.
> 
> I then got spoiled, which annoyed me, but whatever.

**Author's Note:**

> I headcanoned this almost as soon as I started picking the casual/sarcastic answers, it just felt right.


End file.
